Like a Red Rubber Ball

Evidently, we are in big trouble. By we, I mean, all inhabitants of Earth. Well..in a sort of metaphorical-mystical kinda way. No, it's not a zombie plague/takeover. That's coming for sure and don't make say, "I told you so" when it happens.

Hercolubus or Red Planet is hurtling towards Earth and we, to quote Linus, are "dooooomed." The official website offers a free copy of the "book" which is more like a short story and a groovy video to watch. (Note: the use of real human suffering footage in this video to further their point is a bit sick,)

When this loony and unsolicited book came in, I was excited because of the potential fun I thought I could have interviewing people who believe in giant destructive planets, Venusians and all sorts of serious insanity:

The gnostic master states that the Red Planet is five (5) or six (6) times larger than Jupiter and that nothing will be able to stop or deviate it. Hercolubus will bring tragedy, earthquakes, seaquakes and much darkness. He also says that the giant planet is populated by a humanity with a psychological nature similar to the inhabitants of Earth, and they are as dangerous as the earthlings. (Source)

I sent an email offering a radio interview. Yes, it is devilment on my part because you know what I would do with the audio! Since these people are from Spain, they cited a language barrier that would prevent the author from conducting such, so with tongue fully planted in cheek, I sent the following questions (You can tell when my sarcasm gets the best of me):

1. What is the source of the Hercolubus?

2. What is the data supporting the existence of the Hercolubus?

3. Why is it moving like a comet and not a planet?

4. Is it friendly or does it mean Earth harm?

5. The book talks about Venusians. There has been no verification of life on Venus. Where are you getting this information? How do you know this exists?

6. Is the book intended to be a work of fiction?

7. According to some, there is a reptilian race of beings who are coming to conquer us. What do you know of this?

8. Does this have connection to Halley's comet?

Their answer:

The book Hercolubus or Red Planet deals basically with spiritual topics. The investigations supporting the affirmations on it have been carried out through its author's internal faculties and not through physical equipment. Such faculties, unfortunately forgotten in our present day civilization, can include meditation, astral projection, and internal revelations. The information received through those channels is as real to the receiver as it is the information received by senses like sight or hearing. Verification through physical methods, nowadays the only methods admitted by official science, is sometimes limited. However, sometimes it is enough to verify and prove a phenomenon.

The main purpose of that book is to alert humanity and encourage individuals to look inside and to start a spiritual work through which we can awake and liberate our consciousness. Our effort when disseminating that book is aimed at raising eagerness to practice the keys that are given in the last two chapters: the elimination of the psychological defects and astral projection. Therefore, that book is not a work of fiction but a true survival guide. Its author pointed out that it should not be used to make theories out of it, but to lead us to awaken our consciouness. We remain at your disposal to deepen the practical side of that book so as it can be of real use to your audience. Best regards, Carles Esquerda

What a hokey cop-out. Here I was hoping for some excitement! Giant red planets! Creatures on Venus! Zombies! Er...No, that's another book.

Are they selling something? "Spiritual retreats" for the gullible? Private lessons in astral projection?

Plus, they dodged the reptilian race question and I know that's real.

Captain Kirk had to fight one.

Hickory Dickory Neglected Clock

Actual dialogue. I like the subtle guilt messages.

Have you seen my clock? It is a cheapo. No great loss, but I kept it here on the desk to help us keep up with the time while we worked.


I might have knocked it under/behind the desk. I'll take a look on Monday...I know I've seen it on the desk very recently.

I had looked there earlier but couldn't see it under the desk. This morning I used a flashlight and was able to see it back behind all of those wires in the corner. If you folks don't want to be bothered with a clock on the desk I can put it in a drawer and bring it out only when I'm working. I had left it there thinking it would benefit all of us.

Nah. I liked the clock. Didn't notice that it was missing.If you want, we can move the desk on Monday and grab it.

Thanks, I finally spotted it among the nest of wires and retrieved it this morning. As I said earlier, the clock is a cheapo, so wouldn't have been any great loss if it were missing. If you folks do want it to remain on the desk we need to keep it somewhere where it won't be repeatedly knocked off.

The Price of Everything

The Id. It's for real, kids. And when it goes unchecked, life becomes unreal because there are no boundaries. Fame brings about many things and a whole shitload of trouble. Superstardom must be the worst of these. Though I have had dreams of fame, I kind of realize how self-destructive it all is and surely how much I would have abused it.

Reports suggest what I suspected: self-medicating. Who would stop him? Isolation and withdrawal are other common elements of the fame game. No center, no "personal discipline" (Fripp) nobody pulling you back from the edge and nothing holds. Your inner voice says, "I'm a god. Nothing can harm me." Think of the Elvi god and his entourage or as they called themselves, the Memphis Mafia. Who stepped in and tried to stop the abuse?

A bubble, a plastic world, an unreal existence, getting whatever you want whenever you want it, constantly being told how wonderful you are. People malfunction under these circumstances.

I think this picture says it all.

Sign, Sign, Everywhere a Sign

I know Bill has posted this before, but since we are on the topic of the universe, order versus chaos and asking for things from the heavens, we should spin the Magic Eight to ask. These are the results.


1. Will I ever get a raise? Yes. (Score 1 for me. Yay!)

2. Will I ever be as cool and awesome as Darth Vadar? Absolutely! (Really?! I never even dreamed, not even secretly.)

3. Will I get a romp with an old flame? Maybe (At least it's not a no.)

4. Do I have a shot with the cute girl at Blockbuster? Maybe. (Hey, this is going too well to be true.)

5. Could I beat Donald Trump in an arm wrestling contest? Ask again later. (Perhaps my reserve of luck is getting thinner. If I couldn't take that pathetic comb-over mano a mano, best to stop.)

Oh, and those signs I was talking about? Turns out they were closer to the above Croc warning sign. Yep. Best to stay away. Usually, our instincts are right. Trust them.

Then consult a fortune teller.

Co-inky-dink?

"Quantum mechanics is certainly imposing. But an inner voice tells me that it is not yet the real thing. The theory says a lot, but does not really bring us any closer to the secret of the 'old one'. I, at any rate, am convinced that He does not throw dice."
-Einstein

What are we mere creatures to do when pondering the universe? We can see beauty in unexpected places. But is there an order, a plan? I tend to fall on the choatic side of any universe theory, but sometimes I wonder.

Lately, there seems to be a host of coincidences that suggest that the universe is messing with my mind. There could be a very reasonable explanation for all of them, but it's making me look skyward and say, "You're just messing with me, aren't you?"

To combat these notions, I say, why not go completely random; kind of like placing value in a fortune cookie (which only comes true if you eat it, by the way. Trust me, it's true.). I trust John Cage's Indeterminacy stories here. Click on the little >> button and up pops a story. Who knows if these goofy, touching and often funny Cageisms will solve any doubts.

Brian Eno's Oblique Strategies is another useful one. Click random card.

Let's try it, shall we? A random run? I swear I did this randomly.


Q:Will I get a raise??


Cage: #162 "A depressed young man came to see Hazel Dreis, the bookbinder. He said, I’ve decided to commit suicide.” She said, “I think it’s a good idea. Why don’t you do it?”

Well, that's encouraging. On to Eno.

Eno: Don't be afraid of things because they are easy to do.

Easy???

Nice and great help, guys. I'm thinking that the answer to my question is a flat-out NO.

Co-inky-dinks are just that....

signs of an ordered universe. ; )

A Little Rain

I've been thinking lately that our National Anthem is feeling a bit stale. I propose we change it to this Tom Waits tune.


A Little Rain
-Tom Waits

Well, the ice man's mule
is parked outside the bar
Where a man with missing fingers
plays a strange guitar
And the German dwarf
dances with the butcher's son
And tonight a little rain never hurt no one

Well, they're dancing on the roof
and the ceiling's coming down
And I sleep with my shovel and my leather gloves
and a little trouble makes it worth the going
And a little rain never hurt no one

Oh, the world is round
and I'll go around
You must risk something that matters
Oh, my hands are strong
I'll take any man here
If it's worth the going
it's worth the ride

She was 15 years old
and she'd never seen the ocean
She climbed into a van
with a vagabond
And the last thing she said
was "I love you mom"
And a little rain never hurt no one
And a little rain never hurt no one

Rest in Peace

Many moons ago, Greg, Craig and I took a vacation to Puerto Rico. Our drummer, Glenn, came from there and offered us a unique opportunity to see his native land from an insider's point of view.

There are many, many stories to tell, but meeting Glenn's father was unforgettable. His father, Emilio, passed away last week. He was a man who was warm, funny, kind and generous. His musical skills were top notch: musician, conductor, composer, arranger-the list goes on and on.

http://obit.porterloring.com/obitdisplay.html?id=678541&listing=Current

So, rest peacefully, amigo.

"Well done, my good and faithful servant."

If You Haven't Seen This

Feel the Burn

Ok, who cares about my opinion on a TV series?

You're right. You got me. I'm being boring here, but I gotta say I really like Burn Notice.



This little gem of a program has it all: interesting characters, fast as hell pacing and a good sense of humor. Call it spy show light; as it never commits the fatal mistake of other cable programs: taking itself way too seriously. (X Files anyone?)

Micheal Westen, the central character has been tossed out of the CIA and the ongoing plot line is to find out who and why. Fiona, the trigger happy ex, is more comfortable shooting weapons and blowing things up than she is still carrying a torch for Micheal. Sam is the Hawaiian shirt wearing, booze swilling ex-military buddy who would rather live the good life than be involved in the spy biz.

Very clever, very fast and funny.

In the Weeds

We have been following the Showtime series,Weeds. Since we don't get the program, we wait for the DVD release. Season Four is out and we are doing our typical marathon.

This is the best way. If you can delay gratification (impossible in this day of instant everything), then you get the fun of watching a complete season over a few nights.

At first, we were attracted to the basic idea: a recently widowed suburban soccer mom (Mary-Louise Parker) decides to sell pot to make a living. The milf-gone-pot-dealer was the hook and the stoned jokes were aplenty, but this isn't enough to base an entire series on - although Kevin Nealon as the Peter Pan middle aged pothead is still very, very funny. The show had to have more than got-the-munchies gags and writer Jenji Kohan delivers. The show has won numerous awards.

The characters in every series have to develop. Weeds is very good at this and also at presenting the dangerous side of the drug dealing world. Nancy Botwin (Parker's character) started out as a meek, afraid and in over-her-head aspiring entrepreneur and now, she tells cops to back off, hardened street thugs she wants more action, is getting in bed (literally) with the Mexican drug cartel.

What's curious is that the very last thing that seems to be on her mind is the welfare of her family which is supposedly why she still involved with the harsh, merciless, but lucrative drug trade. There is a reckless, danger seeking side to Botwin that is unexplainable in sensible terms. Perhaps that is why we watch.

Mary-Louise Parker is luminous. The actress has one of those magnetic faces that can fill a lens with any emotion she chooses. Parker is at times absolutely beautiful, then looking a bit like an awkward teenager, a guilty mom, and then a slutty mistress. This season, they have certainly stepped up the nudity and adult situations.

That's why I watch.

I'm only kidding.

Not.

To a Different Drummer

David Carradine.

Sheesh. Now, that guy was a real maverick. Some might say he was a bit nuts. He lived and breathed the whole hippy lifestyle. He didn't just grow a ponytail as a mid-life crisis as some boomers do (or the dreaded earring), he was the '60s.

Actor? Hit and miss, I'd say. Death Race 2000 was a hoot.

But who could forget Kung Fu?

"When you can take the pebble from my hand, it will be time for you to leave."

This show took our young imaginations to the martial arts and the perennial stoner Eastern philosophy.

There was that incident, while on LSD, where he broke into a neighbor's house and played the piano. Trouble was, he had cut his hands and evidently was playing with bloody hands.

At the height of his Kung Fu-ness, he appeared on the talk show circuit. The host had to do their best to understand his philosophic word salad, but the real kicker came when he sang one of his songs.

"It's a great big cosmic joke. Ha, ha, ha!" That was the chorus.

Charlie and I looked at each other in amused disbelief. He wasn't a faker. He was a real gone cat. Though he mellowed and became more coherent oddly enough, he was still the same wildman of years ago.

Evidently, that never changed.

Raise the Flag

Head in the Clouds

Seriously

The Whole "Coug" Thing

Know a cougar that has everything? What about this leopard print welcome mat?

This will tell all of her "guests" that within lies a temple, the feminine powers of the ages, the den of the cougar.

And you can get them at Lowes.

Oh yeah.